The Venus Cuckoldress Podcast
The Venus Cuckoldress Podcast
Locking Up - with KINK3D
This episode features K.D. from Kink3D.com and explores the intricate world of chastity, debunking myths and highlighting the psychological and emotional components of this kink. Learn how chastity can significantly enhance intimacy and redefine sexual experiences for both partners.
• Examination of common myths surrounding chastity
• Discussion on the psychological aspects of wearing a chastity cage
• Importance of proper fitting for comfort and satisfaction
• Tips for maintaining hygiene while using chastity devices
• Strategies for communicating about desires with partners
• Insights into the rising popularity of chastity within relationships
Links:
https://kink3d.com/ and https://bsky.app/profile/kink3d.com
Chastity in Cosmo - https://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/a63265805/chastity-fetish/
Join the 2 Week Chasity Challenge - https://www.venuscuckoldress.com/offers/FTNWndiv/checkout
Join the Live Chats with Key Barrett MSc, and Venus - https://www.crowdcast.io/@venus-cuckoldress
Venus's MaisonDeNeige line - https://www.maisondeneige.com/couture/p/bodysuitevenus
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❤️Venus Connections❤️ - Matchmaking for loving cuckolding relationships and female-led relationships. Learn more at https://www.venusconnections.com/
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Destination Links for Venus - https://linktr.ee/venuscuckoldress
Here's what's coming up on the show.
Speaker 2:We see ourselves as being about halfway between sex toys and fashion accessories, and something that's so cool about chastity is that it operates in both those worlds. It's definitely a sex toy, but it also is something that accentuates and accessorizes the body. I would say the single number one myth that we hear is that wearing a cage is going to make your penis smaller. So this is called shrinkage, if you, if you see it online. People constantly ask about it and sometimes people are scared of this and they're worried about that, and sometimes people are actually really aroused by that and they say, oh, is it going to shrink If you have a small penis? Humiliation kind of fetish. They're actually kind of excited by that, and the answer to both the people who want it and the people who are terrified of it is no, that is not going to happen.
Speaker 2:A lot of people who really aren't very familiar with chastity and are trying it for the first time think if I find a cage that fits me right, it's going to be inescapable, I'm not going to be able to sneak my penis out of it, I'm not gonna be able to cheat, and the kind of dirty secret, if you will, of chastity products is that that's just not true. Yeah, we hear that all the time, exactly what you said, that people will unlock and they'll come, and they'll be so excited to come and then, as soon as they do, they will just immediately regret it. So it's a very addictive kink where, for sure, some people are just never going to be into it, it's not going to be their thing. But people who are into it get very, very into it.
Speaker 1:This is the Venus Cuckoldris podcast a place to learn all things cuckolding for the curious, for the passionate and for the sexually empowered woman who wants it all. Let's go, welcome to the show. I'm your host, venus. Thanks for joining me. Today I have KD from kink3dcom who's going to talk all about chastity cages, and this is so fascinating. You're going to love this episode. I learned so much. It was crazy.
Speaker 1:And the air date for today's episode is February 1st, which is day one of the Locked in Love Chastity Challenge that I'm doing again with Key Barrett, one of my favorite authors and of my favorite books, Locked in Love. So we're going to do this two-week chastity challenge. It ends on Valentine's Day, so unlocking day is Valentine's Day. How sweet. What a great gift you're going to have for each other. I have posted all of the rules for everybody involved in the Chastity Challenge, including those who are locked, those who are key holders, and rules for everyone, and you can find those rules in the Queens Quarters community at venuscuckledresscom. It's free to join. If you want to join this challenge, you can get limited free access to the Queens Quarters community by just clicking on the link at venuscuckledresscom. You can also find it in the link for today's show notes. It is going to be tons of fun. So if you've been sitting on the fence about either key holding or chastity or doing this together, this is your opportunity to try it out for two weeks. I I mean, you don't have to stay locked the whole time, obviously, but it is a really mind-blowing experience. If you've never tried it before, it is incredible what it does for relationships. So give it a try, it's fun. And as for announcements, before we jump in, um just a couple. I am going to be doing some live chats with Key Barrett. We're going to do that on Crowdcast together, and this is to talk about chastity. These are two live chats that we're going to do during the two-week Locked in Love Chastity Challenge. So the first one is Monday, february the 3rd. It's going to be at 6 pm Pacific time, that's 9 pm Eastern, live on Crowdcast. The link is in the show notes for today for you to join if you would like to come and join us there and ask questions about chastity or share your experience on how it's going so far in the Chastity Challenge. And then the second one is also a Monday. That's going to be February the 10th, same time 6pm Pacific, 9pm Eastern. So make sure you check that out. And it is free. All you have to do is just register and then you'll get an email right before the event starts where you can join. The second announcement this is so awesome. I've been waiting so long to be able to announce this to you guys, to be able to announce this to you for you guys.
Speaker 1:I have my own line of Venus stuff at MaisonDenagecom. So my favorite clothing line is MaisonDenagecom. It's been around for years and the woman who does this is amazing. I love her clothes. I've talked about it before. On the show she does lifestyle clothes for anybody interested in interracial. So lots of Queen of Spades stuff, lots of Snow Bunny stuff. She's got some cuck stuff, some you know Jack of Spades stuff, like literally she has everything. She's got different lines, like couture and you know all this stuff. It is so well designed and well made. All of the fabrics are just so soft, so high end, like it's just it's wonderful, anyway. So I have a Venus line there and I've modeled a few of the items, so one being this foil body suit, slash swimsuit. So I actually wore this at an event last year as a body suit. It's like a swimsuit, but I wore it as a body suit because it's super low cut and I've got the new titties and, holy shit, like it looked so fucking gorgeous and the design, the colors are beautiful. So she, I told her I wanted something that was kind of like a charm bracelet that's how I see this lifestyle Not really one symbol to symbolize cuckolding.
Speaker 1:I'm like there's then the queen crown, because, of course, and then the owl and some of you might find this really interesting, really new, but like, we decided that the owl should be the symbol of cucks, like, and I, because I think that's so great, the owl is always watching right and I know that some people are like well, isn't it like the horns, like the deer horns or whatever that means cuckolding Like. Yeah, I get that. I've heard that it goes back to the like, you know, eons ago, medieval days, where the cuck had to wear horns while he walked down the street, humiliated by people because his wife cheated on him, down the street, humiliated by people because his wife cheated on him. Yeah, I get that, but the owl is just so much cuter and of course there's the great horned owl. I mean hello. So I was like you just picture the owl, like literally always watching, like at night, just like watching. This is so perfect. So we've got the owl, we've got the heart, we've got the crown, and then, of course, all the spade stuff and everything. So perfect. So we've got the owl, we've got the heart, we've got the crown, and then, of course, all the spade stuff and everything like that. So it's beautiful. All the colors are like. So my colors, I love them.
Speaker 1:So I'll put the links in the show notes, for today it's the bodysuit slash swimsuit, which is fucking beautiful super high cut at the bottom and super low cut on the chest. And then there's this awesome little cropped hoodie. That is just fucking gorgeous as well. So there you go. Maison Deneige, my favorite lifestyle brand, is coming through. Make sure you check it out. Oh and last but not least, oh my gosh, you guys, I can't say much about this, because this is an announcement that's going to be coming up, uh, soon, possibly on the next show. Um, but I there is a huge project that I've had in the works there for a while there, and it's almost ready to go, so I'm excited to be able to bring this to you. That's all I could say is just like please tune into the next episode because like it's more than likely going to be announced on that one. So, anyway, that's all I'm saying. Okay, let's jump into today's episode right after this quick announcement.
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Speaker 1:It's Joy Mode Joining me on the show. This is the first time I've had someone who produces chastity cages or a chastity company person come on the show and his name is KD. He's from Kink 3D Chastity Company and I'm so excited to have you here today. Thanks for joining me. Say hello to all of the listeners. Hey, venus, it's so great to be here. Okay, I'm like this is great timing, but I'm very excited to talk about this. This is excellent timing because for a couple of reasons. So this show is going to be aired on day one of the two-week Chastity Challenge, that's, the Locked in Love Chastity Challenge, with myself and Key Barrett, author of the book Locked in Love, one of my all-time favorite books. So it is going to be right at the beginning of the challenge. Great timing. I'm so happy to have you on the show to talk about Chastity. But also, wasn't there just recently an article that came out? In which magazine was it? Cosmo? It was Okay. And what did that say? What did that article say?
Speaker 2:Yeah, it was so exciting to see this. It came out a few weeks ago, but they just posted it to their Instagram yesterday and it's an article about how the site Clips for Sale has just named Chastity as their fetish of the year for 2025. So they did this based on all of the data and analytics that they capture about what's really blowing up in the world of porn, and it turns out that chastity is on sort of an exponential curve upward.
Speaker 1:Who would have thought it's so funny and I can't wait to get into, like your business and everything like that. But I've been talking about chastity for years, for years, and I get a lot of. There's two camps that guys are like oh yeah, oh yeah, chastity is so great, yeah, love it, I can't wait to try it. Blah, blah, blah. And then there's the other guys who have a knee-jerk reaction like fuck, no, I could never, like that is so scary, there's no fucking way. So I can't wait to jump into it with you. So your company is called Kink 3D, and tell me a little bit about your company, how you got started in all of this Sure.
Speaker 2:So I'll give a little bit of personal backstory here. I've always been a pretty kinky dude and I'm one of those people when you hang around BDSM circles. There's a kind of common origin story that you hear from a lot of people, which is oh, I was seven or eight and I was watching cartoons and the princess got captured and put in the dungeon and something about that just really kind of tingled my brain and I knew something exciting about that and I was one of those people. So I've always been into a lot of stuff in that area of sexuality.
Speaker 2:And chastity was something that I came across at some point on the internet and thought, oh, that looks kind of interesting, and bought a product or two and tried them and they really did not work for me. Just immediately they caused problems, they were uncomfortable, they seemed outright dangerous, and I looked around and couldn't find anything better and thought, man, okay, I guess this kink just isn't for me. I don't know how other people are doing it, but I'm going to put that aside, and there's plenty other kinks in the sea, so I'll just give up on this one. And a couple of years after that I saw on Reddit someone posted a photo of themselves wearing a locking cock ring, and it was kind of two parts that connect together with this little lock and it was sort of like chastity light and I had this idea okay, that seems kind of cool, Maybe I can do that, maybe that'll work for me.
Speaker 2:So there was a company in Poland that hand welds these things. They're like super. So, yeah, you can tell how much of a kinkster I am. So I ordered one and a few months later it arrived and it just did not work the way that I wanted it to, and I got so frustrated by this experience that my one shot at something chastity related still didn't work out that I decided, okay, I'm just going to do this myself. So I started learning about 3D modeling. So I learned the software to do what's called CAD modeling, which is computer aided modeling, and also started learning about 3D printing at the same time and put those two things together and started prototyping my own products, originally those kind of locking cock rings, and then, pretty quickly after that, the community that I was talking to really just wanted to see cages, so started working on those as well, and they really took off.
Speaker 1:So you 3D print these cages.
Speaker 2:That's correct. So they're 3D printed. But if you look at them, if you have any, if a lot of your listeners may have some familiarity with 3D printing, and typically if you look at them, if you have any, if a lot of your listeners may have some familiarity with 3D printing, and typically if you look at a 3D print, there'll be what's called layer lines on them, which means that they're basically kind of rough. They have lots of little steps on them and that's what's stereotypical with 3D printing. Ours do not look like that at all. So I've shown these products to friends of mine who are mechanical engineers and their heads just explode when they see them. They do not understand the technology of how we make what we do, because when you look at it and you feel it and you get it in your hands, they don't have any of that kind of layer line stepping to the surface. They just feel like an incredibly smooth product. So that's the result of using really the cutting edge of what's. The jargon is additive manufacturing, but basically it means 3D printing.
Speaker 1:Okay, I know nothing about that sort of thing. Are all of the cages made from the same material?
Speaker 2:With slight variations. Yes, they're all made from what's called PA-12 nylon powder.
Speaker 1:There's slightly different types of that that we use for different colors and different products, but basically they're all the same Okay okay and so so chastity being so popular and I'm not really surprised to hear that it's so popular Cuckolding is crazy popular too, and the two kind of do kind of go hand in hand a little bit in some circles, but I'm not surprised, like with it being so popular. Have you noticed like more and more demand for your cages? Because, like I contacted you back in October, you were like I'm so fucking busy right now, you back in October, and you were like I'm so fucking busy right now with Locktober, so I'm like all right, cool, so is this big demand for it?
Speaker 2:We have definitely seen that. We have seen huge growth over the five years since I started the business, and particularly the past I would say one to two years. It feels like it's really hit a kind of inflection point, almost where it's hit a certain level of mainstreamness within the kink world. That's really taking off. It's been very exciting to see.
Speaker 1:Yeah, Key Barrett was talking about that before, where he was saying how many chastity cages are sold on Amazon? Like it, that they have it in there like their big warehouse, like you can get it delivered in four hours because they have so many of them, Cause they sell so many of them. I'm just like damn, like holy shit. So I spoke to a couple, some some of the helpful cocktail members that do support the podcast. I told my private Snapchat group that I was going to be interviewing you and they were so excited. They're like oh my God, I have the Cobra cage from that company and I fucking love it, and they've shown me pictures and everything. I'm like oh, it's a really nice cage. So how many different types of cages do you sell, and do you only sell male chastity devices, or is there such thing as a female chastity device?
Speaker 2:So I'll answer the second question first and then go to the first one. So the second question we do only do male or technically penis having, because we actually have quite a few trans customers as well but primarily male chastity devices.
Speaker 2:That is the bread and butter of our company. We get a surprising number of requests, including from various friends of mine, for female chastity, what you would say chastity belts as well, full belts that go around the waist. We've had a number of requests for people who would love to see an improvement to those products, a kind of latest and greatest product in the market from us for that, and it's just a much more challenging engineering project. There's a lot more material, there's a lot more complex geometry that goes into that. So so far we haven't done it, but we would love to in the future if we can figure out a good way to do it.
Speaker 1:Right, because it has to go around the waist. It's got to be, I guess, much more substantial than just something sticking on a wiener. Exactly, it's got to be, I guess, much more substantial than just something sticking on a wiener.
Speaker 2:Exactly. There are a lot of more practicality issues there. Can you design something where people can still do their thing and go about their day and sleep comfortably in it ideally, go to the gym comfortably in it ideally and so far we haven't figured out any. We haven't had the inspiration on how to do that in a way that would satisfy our pretty rigorous standards for what we want when we launch a new product. But the requests have been frequent. I think of this as it's almost like Title IX for chastity. It's women banging down our doors saying we want equal opportunity to have our orgasms denied to you and I feel really bad that we can't provide it. But we just haven't figured it out yet.
Speaker 1:I'm just picturing that that would not be me, just so you know.
Speaker 2:I can imagine from having listened to your podcast.
Speaker 2:And to answer your first question about how many different ones do we make, the answer is when I started I thought, oh, maybe we'll have three sizes of cages, and then each time that I landed on a lineup that I was happy with, I would keep getting emails or social media messages from customers saying, hey, can you make something halfway between this and this, because it doesn't fit me quite right. So, fast forwarding to today, we actually have 40 cage sizes and then 24 ring sizes, which is the piece that goes behind the whole package. So when you multiply that together, there are actually 960 distinct size combinations that you can get from us to fit your anatomy. So that's one of the things that we really pride ourselves on is that we have all of those in stock you can order and generally it'll get shipped out in about two to three business days, and that is just way more than basically any other company on the market. So we try really hard to have something that's going to fit almost everyone's anatomy really comfortably and really well.
Speaker 1:I'm not surprised to hear that guys need to have different size combinations or whatever, because, like the biggest complaint that I have heard from guys, other than they're scared or it is difficult to sleep in, is that finding the right fit is really difficult. So how does it work? Like when guys go online, they're like do you provide them with instructions on how to measure them? What if they buy it and it doesn't fit? Can they send it back? Is that a dumb question? I don't know. It's not. Like you can send back underwear, so I don't know.
Speaker 2:It's not a dumb question at all.
Speaker 2:I'll try to answer all of those points that you raised.
Speaker 2:So, first of all, sizing is indeed one of the biggest challenges with chastity and it can be really frustrating if you get something and it just doesn't work quite right for you, particularly because, as you said, in most cases it's a product that you're not going to be able to return because of the intimate nature of the products.
Speaker 2:We do a number of things to do our best to help with that. We have a lot of guidance on our website. We have an awesome customer service team who are very well trained. Where you can email us, you can actually send in photos. So we're a very unusual office where a lot of people's professional job in our offices look very carefully, analyzing photos of people's dicks that they send in and then trying to give the best advice that we can, and sometimes we'll have 10 or 20 emails in an email chain where we really try to dial in what we think is going to work well for someone. So we do our best on that. We also partner with stores and events where you can, in fact, have a whole sizing experience to try on the product in person.
Speaker 2:So we partner with about 10 stores around the world now and we're working very hard to significantly increase that number. So in major cities like San Francisco, New York, London, Amsterdam, we have stores that you can just go into and try on our range of products, and you can find all those on our website.
Speaker 1:I did not know that you could go in a store and try on a chastity cage.
Speaker 2:I did not know that they get carefully cleaned afterwards. And, yeah, I believe that we are the first brand that has offered that experience and we're working very hard to expand it. We also go to a lot of kink-related events. So I don't know if you've heard of the Folsom Street Fair, which is a huge kink event that happens each year in San Francisco, and there's a number of other events like that around the country and indeed around the world, and we're going to more and more of those, and then our team will give expert, fitting advice and let people try them on while they're there.
Speaker 1:Oh, that's great. I think people would really enjoy and benefit from something like that, where they can actually be there, see the product and be able to talk to people and get advice about fitting, because, yeah, it seems to be a big struggle for the guys thinking about chastity. I've heard all sorts of things. I just posted something on my Blue Sky I think it was yesterday or the day before yesterday. What's the most difficult thing about chastity? It was actually a great thread, but there were a lot of comments on there about getting the right fit stuff, pinching or shaping, or difficult to sleep in or difficult to go to the gym and stuff like that.
Speaker 1:For me, I'm like I don't give a fuck about any of that stuff, obviously because, like I'm a key holder. So for me, the most important part of the chastity cage is what it looks like. I want the Ferrari of fucking chastity cages and I want it to look beautiful. And so how do you balance that between the designs that you create, being functional and not pinching and not chafing and all that stuff, but also being very nice to look at where people are like, oh damn, that one looks really good. I want to buy that one.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I think you really hit the nail on the head where what we are trying to accomplish as a company is to not compromise on either form or function, and in fact, we see ourselves as being about halfway between sex toys and fashion accessories, and something that's so cool about Chastity is that it operates in both those worlds.
Speaker 2:It's definitely a sex toy, but it also is something that accentuates and accessorizes the body, and we know how important that is to people and you want it to look good, and I think honestly that's part of the reason that it has taken off is that it encourages people to be exhibitionists online because they want to show off how awesome they look and especially, it's a form of exhibitionism where you can do it without showing your face, so that also makes it a little bit lower stakes for people to do online.
Speaker 2:But we do work hard, and so I'm actually I'm still our cage designer and I work really hard to do designs that are going to make people, whether they're big or small, whether they have a huge dick or a really small dick, that they're still going to feel great about their body and they're still going to look at themselves in the cage and like the way they look and I'm really proud that our cages have been described as like a tuxedo for the cock or like Seville Row, if you're familiar with that British fashion like the Seville Row of chastity cages. People do say those things and I feel really happy about that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's got to feel good. That's the kind of feedback that you definitely would want if you're designing chastity cages. What about the keys? Do you pay attention to the way that the keys look? Because, as a key holder, I have found some of the keys are ugly as fuck. I'm like this looks like something someone dropped in Home Depot. I don't know. I want to wear this on a chain on my neck.
Speaker 2:So that is a great question, and what I can tell you is that we are working on that. Our keys are not as bad as some of the ones out there. There is a particularly embarrassing trend for the really cheap Chinese knockoffs of cages to come with keys that say BDSM stamped on them, so we avoid that particular pitfall. However, our current keys are not all that nice to look at. They're pretty industrial, but we're actually working on a much more attractive key option. So stay tuned a few months from now and I may have a better answer for you on that question.
Speaker 1:Oh, that's good. Yeah, because I was just like I love key holding and everything like that, but I kind of want the key to look, the mat to match the Ferrari, you know like we totally agree with you, and that's something we're actively working on Um, what are some common myths and misunderstandings about chastity other than you know?
Speaker 1:just like I said earlier, the fact that I get a lot of guys who say I could never do that, and I I'm like actually you could and you would enjoy it shockingly. What are some common myths and misunderstandings about chastity that you've learned over the years?
Speaker 2:Yeah. So I think we totally should get into later why people like chastity so much and why they'd want to do it like you just brought up. But to get into the question of myths and common mistakes that people make yes, there are quite a few. So I would say the single number one myth that we hear is that wearing a cage is going to make your penis smaller. So this is called shrinkage. If you see it online, people constantly ask about it and sometimes people are scared of this and they're worried about that. And sometimes people are actually really aroused by that and they say, ooh, is it going to shrink if you have a small penis? Humiliation kind of fetish? They're actually kind of excited by that and the answer to both the people who want it and the people who are terrified of it is no, that is not going to happen. There is no reason to believe, in all the research that we've done and all the medical professionals that we've talked to, that wearing a cage is going to have any sort of permanent change to the anatomy of the penis. That's just not going to happen. So that's the first one.
Speaker 2:The next myth I would raise is a lot of people who really aren't very familiar with chastity and are trying it for the first time, think if I find a cage that fits me right, it's going to be inescapable.
Speaker 2:I'm not going to be able to sneak my penis out of it, I'm not going to cheat, and the kind of dirty secret, if you will, of chastity products is that that's just not true.
Speaker 2:Chastity cages are not inescapable. They are not Fort Knox, unless you're using a piercing to actually physically lock your penis onto the bars of the cage, which a number of our customers do. In fact, some of our customers get a penis piercing specifically to use for chastity because they're so turned on by the idea that they can lock themselves in and they won't be able to get themselves out, even if they want to. But for the average person who's not doing it, with a piercing you're going to be able to get out if you try hard enough, and so I always want people to know that going in, because I don't want people to have the wrong expectations and then be disappointed. There's always going to be a mental component to chastity, as a kink, as well as the purely physical component, and you have to want to go along with it, whether it's just by yourself, or if you're doing it with a key holder, with a partner, you have to be mentally committed to the process.
Speaker 1:Yeah, oh, I've definitely heard stories of people who've lost the key, so it's interesting to hear you say that you could get out if you really wanted to.
Speaker 2:Yes and no. You can generally get out in the sense that you can slip your penis out the back of the cage. So in that sense you can cheat because you can access your penis, you can touch yourself, you can get pleasure, and that's something that of course people the dream is to not be able to do. That. That's the whole turn on. But for certain people's anatomies and certain sizes of cages you might genuinely not be able to slip the whole device off of your package. In other words, you might not be able to get your balls out through the gap between the two pieces of the device. So in that sense, if you lose the key, it is stuck on your body. You're not going to be able to get it off without breaking it or using some kind of tool to snap it or something. It is going to be stuck on your body but it might be kind of dangling in a fairly undignified way because you could get your penis out the back, but then it's kind of dangling off your balls between your legs.
Speaker 2:So you don't want to end up in that situation.
Speaker 1:That would be embarrassing um, okay, yes, let's get into why people want to do chastity in the first place. Um, I definitely feel like there's more of a draw, like for men this is, I don't know what it is. It's definitely more enticing for a lot of guys. Um, key for, but for key holding. For women I don't find it has the same kind of draw, although for some of my friends and I I mean I know what that feels like to hold the keys it is pretty fucking phenomenal. But the fascinating thing over the years is that a lot of guys have said that they were hesitant or scared at first about chastity, but then they found like they actually didn't want to be unlocked and like that they want to stay like locked up and that like, if they are unlocked and they're allowed to come, that like they're like oh that sucked, like I just want to be locked up again. This is so crazy for a lot of guys to hear because they're like what? This makes no sense. What is the draw? Why do guys love it so much?
Speaker 2:Yeah, we hear that all the time. Exactly what you said, that people will unlock and they'll come, and they'll be so excited to come and then, as soon as they do, they will just immediately regret it. So it's a very addictive kink where, for sure, some people are just never going to be into it, it's not going to be their thing. But people who are into it get very, very into it. So there's a few reasons, I think, why it is such an appealing kink and particularly why it overlaps and goes so well with cuckolding, which is, of course, of interest to you. So the way that I often describe this is that you can kind of view sex toys or divide sex toys into two different types of categories. There's the more traditional sex toys go into the category of pleasure, right? So dildos or vibrators, they're there to give you pleasure and ultimately, hopefully, make you come, whereas a second category of sex toys is not about the destination, but it's more about the journey. It's about arousal, it's about building your sexual energy to a higher level, and that's really where chastity cages fall into place. So if you wear a cage for even a day or a few days, you're going to build that horniness to a higher and higher level. We had a customer who referred to our products as a perpetual horny machine and I really loved that and that's really fun. Some people just really love that state of being in a heightened, buzzing state of sexual energy and that to them is much more important than getting off and coming, particularly for a man, because as a man, if you come, there is that hormonal chemical response where you really crash. You crash in terms of your sexual energy, you can crash in terms of your mood. So if you retain that and you build it and you keep getting hornier and hornier over a period of days or weeks or, in some of our customers' cases, months or longer, it gets you to this higher and higher level of sexual energy. So that's the first reason.
Speaker 2:I think another reason is the hornier you get in a lot of cases, the more it puts you in a mindset where you want to and you feel, where you feel ready to pursue fantasies that you have. So there may be fantasies that people have that are a little bit embarrassing or a little bit scary, that you have. So there may be fantasies that people have that are a little bit embarrassing or a little bit scary. And if you are at work and thinking about that fantasy or just in your normal life and thinking about that fantasy, you might not be ready to do it, but if you're super, super, super horny and turned on, you're going to say, yeah, you know what, I'm going to give that a go.
Speaker 2:So in the cuckolding world, an example that comes to mind for me might be something around a cream pie cleanup, where I think a lot of guys, a lot of cucks, have that fantasy, but then the moment comes and they're squicked out and they're like, oh man, I don't know if I can do this, even though they've been fantasizing it for years. So if you're wearing a chassis cage and you've built up that horniness to this totally insane level, you're going to be more ready to do that. So it's something that can actually help you to explore other fantasies that you maybe have wanted to do for a long time.
Speaker 1:Oh my God, I love that example.
Speaker 2:And I think no, I'm glad I figured that that might resonate with you, yeah, and so another reason, I think, is around those. So those first reasons I gave were really around sex. Right, they were around sex and arousal and horniness. But I think there's also an important reason around the symbolism of wearing a cage, particularly if you're doing it with a partner. So if you're wearing this, it's almost like I refer to it as the sort of classic BDSM collar that you'll see in 50 Shades of Grey or that type of thing, but for the male package instead. So you're wearing something that symbolizes submission, that symbolizes service to the partner that you're in a dynamic with and that can really create this feeling of intimacy and closeness and connection to your partner. And I think that's really important and a big part of this too, that cages can actually really create this higher emotional level where you feel deeply connected to your partner and in a way that enhances the feeling of service and submission.
Speaker 1:I love the symbolism of it so much. I hate it when guys send me dick pics, obviously, but send me a chastity pic, I'm not going to hate it as much. And if it's a beautiful chastity pic then I'm like damn, that is a work of art right there. You know, it's funny.
Speaker 1:The very first time I got introduced to chastity was by accident. It was so bad I was. I was talking to somebody and they mentioned something about prostate milking and I was like I don't know what that is, so I'm going to look it up in Pornhub. And so I did, and I started watching this video and the guy walked into the room and he was naked and all he had on was a chastity cage. I'd never seen one in my life. Okay, I didn't know what it was, I had never heard of one. I looked at it. I was like what the fuck is that? And then he laid down and she was like unlocking it and taking it off and I was like what in the actual fuck is that? Is that like some sort of fashion accessory, Like I don't know what that is?
Speaker 1:But it was after that that I met my friend Jay, who he had a long history with chastity loved it. His girlfriend locked him up for like a year and like he loved it, and so he taught me about. You know what it was like to wear a cage and be in that kind of relationship. And then I was like, oh no, I understand this, but I did not know anything about it before that. How do men especially bring this up to their girlfriend or wife or someone they want to be their key holder and do it in a way in which they will hopefully not be weirded out and kind of understand about why they would want to hold the key or why they want even to lock up in the first place?
Speaker 2:Conveniently. One thing that you could do is point them to the Cosmo article that we talked about at the beginning and say hey, it can't be that strange because it's talked about in Cosmo, so that actually might. I mean, in all seriousness, that could be a good way to do it, because I think that when something is validated by the mainstream media, you know rightly or wrongly, or good or bad, I do actually think that that helps a lot because it feels like, okay, it's not that bizarre, it's out there.
Speaker 1:It's in.
Speaker 2:Cosmo. It's in Cosmo. It can't be that it's the new butt plug, it's the new vibrator, it's the next normal kink. So I think that that can be one thing to do. I think the classic advice that's given around this is to not make it all about you as the man, to rather frame it in the context of hey, this thing turns me on, but also here's what you as the woman are going to get out of it.
Speaker 2:So it's not just something where I'm asking for my partner to be a kink dispenser for me. It's not just something where I'm asking for my partner to be a kink dispenser for me and to suddenly take on this almost burden or this responsibility of I need to be holding the key. I need to. What do I do with that? What does that mean? How do I keep you excited while I'm holding the key? But rather focus on here's why it turns me on.
Speaker 2:It's going to put me into this elevated state of sexual energy as I'm going about my day. If I'm at work or I'm on a business trip or I hell. I'm just in the other room and I'm wearing the cage and I know that you've got the key. I'm going to be thinking about you because I've got this device on my body. That is signifying the connection that I've got with you in a relationship. So it's going to improve mood, it's going to improve sexual energy and it doesn't mean that we have to do it any one particular way.
Speaker 2:Now I think some people think if I get into chastity it means you're never going to get to have sex with me again, and that's not true at all. You can. I think we've talked to a lot of customers who really like this dynamic of I'm going to cage the beast, I'm going to give you the key and you're going to get to control when I take the cage off and when I put it on. But when you want it off, when you get access to my penis, when you want to get fucked, we absolutely can do that. That's awesome.
Speaker 1:It's just that you're going to be the one that gets to choose. Yeah, just like a vibrator is not going to replace your husband's dick, it's just a fun little way to spruce up the bedroom. Fun, that's basically it. I love the advice that you gave. Also, there's the book Locked in Love by Key Barrett, where him and his wife they did two weeks of chastity and she contributed to that book as well and wrote about what it was like from her perspective as a key holder. I think that's a great resource for any women who would like to learn about it or husbands who would just be like, hey, you might really like this. So go read about it in Cosmo and read about it in the Locked in Love book and I swear we're going to have a lot of fun baby. And maybe if guys approach it that way, it won't be so shocking and so weird and like what the fuck? Because, yeah, if you're going from straight vanilla land to chastity, that's a bit of a gap.
Speaker 2:Absolutely, and it doesn't in any way have to be a 24-7 thing you can start with or you don't even have to progress beyond this just a very casual playing with it within a scene, within a sexual encounter. Maybe you wear the cage for 20 minutes while you're eating your girlfriend's pussy or eating your wife's pussy.
Speaker 1:You don't have to go beyond that.
Speaker 2:It can just be something fun and casual that you introduce into sexual dynamics. You don't have to make it an all or nothing, super big serious. Thing.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I'm glad you brought that up, because there is this kind of thought process online, especially where it kind of for a lot of guys it signifies like the death of their penis, like forever, like they're never going to have sex again, and that's like with cuckolding too. A lot of guys just assume that it's all about sexual denial and that cucks would never have PIV sex again. I'm like this is so dumb. I don't know where we get this from, but like this is not the case. This is very much something fun to just amp up your sex life in the bedroom.
Speaker 1:Cuckolding or chastity or both this is just an extra little bit of spice in your sex life and you're right, you can do it however you want. So this because this episode is coming out day one of the chastity challenge. I'm assuming that a lot of guys will already have a cage or have chosen one or whatever, or thinking about it. But for those who don't have a cage or are looking to buy a new cage, what kind of tips or advice would you give them? To? Number one, pick out the right cage that's for them and then isn't measuring like a very like. This is a process that you have to do very carefully and, like I'm pretty sure you have some tips about that.
Speaker 2:I definitely do. We have a lot of information on our website, so that's an easy starting point that I recommend. If you happen to be lucky enough to be in a city that has one of the stores that we partner with, go into a store and you can try them on in person. That is ultimately going to be the best way to do this, rather than guessing online. We'll do our best to help you through customer service, but it is always hard.
Speaker 2:As far as common mistakes that people make, though, or giving some tips, I think there's two important ones that are in sort of equal and opposite directions. One is some people think that I should get a cage that has a lot of extra room in it, because when I get hard, then they'll have room to grow and that'll make me more comfortable. We find, generally, that is not a good idea. If you have extra room in the cage, it's going to be a lot harder to just wear it throughout the day hiding it under your pants. It's going to be bulky. It's going to be messy when you use the bathroom.
Speaker 2:Most people are not happy when they've got extra room. They want to fill the cage all the way when flaccid. The opposite is. A lot of people have a fantasy particularly if they're into more small penis humiliation or emasculation that they want a cage that's going to be really small. They want to cram themselves into a tiny cage. We also do not think that's a good idea. It's just going to look silly and hang off your body and most of your penis won't end up being in the cage. So we really do recommend get one that is a reasonable and good fit for your flaccid size. That's the first piece of advice that I would give.
Speaker 1:Oh, I'm so glad you brought that up. I can't stand seeing chastity pictures. The guy's like he's locked up in a cage. I can't stand it when there's all this extra room in there. I'm like what are you doing? And like that is not to me not attractive to see all that extra space in there. Always tell them that like you know you need to go down a size or two. Like there shouldn't be all of that airiness in there. Like well, ok, we'll talk about air airy, but like cleaning and stuff like that, but there shouldn't be that much room in there, it just should be snug. But then I've seen the other one they're talking about, where they try to get the smallest cage possible and it ends up just flattening this mushy flat. It looks like you're getting a mammogram for your wiener. Like it's just like so flat. You're like that doesn't look right at all.
Speaker 2:So we have a very Goldilocks philosophy on this Not too big, not too small, get one. That's really the right size for your penis.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it needs to look snug and like comfortable and just the right size, like the right fit, okay. And so cleaning how do you care for a chastity cage? It's like if somebody is like, okay, I need to do this, I feel like hygiene and cleaning needs to be really important, but how do you do that if you're locked for any period of time?
Speaker 2:Super important. So this is one of the things that was top of mind for me when I first started designing the products about five years ago. A lot of the plastic cages at that time were basically plastic tubes that didn't have any kind of ventilation whatsoever. They were impossible to keep clean and very quickly they would start to smell bad. It was just gross. It was not a good situation.
Speaker 2:So when I started designing cages, I intentionally had that idea of having a lot of open areas between the bars so that it would be ventilated and so that it would be easy to keep clean. So with the cages that we offer, basically you can wear it without really taking it off and you can just shower. And as long as you're somewhat conscientious about lathering up a lot of soap and getting it in there between the bars and washing it, you can keep it pretty clean and we have really not heard almost any complaints about people staying locked that way. I do think if you are running into issues or just as best practice, taking it off every once in a while, let's say once a week at least, to just give a bit of a deeper cleaning to both the cage and to yourself, is a good idea. I certainly think that makes sense and is a smart thing to do but I don't know that you technically have to do it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I've seen cages that are kind of just like all closed off except for a few holes at the end, and I'm like, oh God, that's a skin infection waiting to happen. I just feel like there's just you can't keep that clean and dry in there for sure. So that's good to know. The more open areas in between the bars and stuff like that, the easier it is to keep clean, just by showering and you and washing properly and stuff like that. That's really really good. One of the big complaints that I hear from guys constantly actually, especially when they're first trying chastity and they have their first night where they sleep with this thing on, they're like, oh my God, that was the worst sleep I've ever had. I was constantly getting woken up with a boner and it was uncomfortable because I was in this cage or it was just terrible. First of all, my reaction is usually just like, oh, suck it up, honey, but you can figure it out. But but anyway, what are some some tips for these guys who really struggle with sleeping with this cage?
Speaker 2:That's a great question. Sleeping is probably the hardest time to to be wearing a cage and this is this is really notorious within the world of chastity because of nighttime erections, because nighttime erections are involuntary and you can't because you're asleep, you don't have the ability to sort of adjust yourself a little bit when it's happening. And so in the old days when I was first getting started with this a lot of the cages on the market you'd wear it and then at four in the morning or five in the morning you'd wake up with this just horrible sense kind of burning sensation under the scrotum and you're you, oh God, I have to get it off right away. I can't handle this anymore, and that was a significant influence to me, and how I wanted to design cages was to prevent that from happening, to really remove any kind of sharp edges and anything that would create that kind of sensation. As far as advice to give people, first it's choose a cage that is as comfortable as possible, that is very rounded, is very smooth, doesn't have any pinch points or anything that's going to hurt at night. The second piece of advice is use some kind of lubricant or lotion, particularly under the balls. Basically that is the area where you get this burning most intensely, and using something like that is going to help to reduce friction and it's going to make it more comfortable. And using something like that is going to help to reduce friction and is going to make it more comfortable.
Speaker 2:The other thing, though, that I think is very important to say is some people are just always going to have trouble sleeping at night in a chastity cage. They could have the most comfortable, most perfectly fitting, excellent cage, and they just still are going to struggle with it, and in those situations, we think it's totally fine to take the cage off before you go to bed and put it back again. Fine to take the cage off before you go to bed and put it back again first thing in the morning. Think of it like we always like to say that. We think of it like glasses or like contacts.
Speaker 2:You go to bed. It's the last thing you take off before you go to sleep. It's the first thing you put on in the morning when you wake up, and it can almost be ritualized in that sort of way, and it's fine. It doesn't make you less devoted to chastity or a less hardcore participant in this kink. It's just allowing you to live your life and do your thing and not be grouchy and miserable all day because you haven't slept well, it's totally fine. So I really encourage people to do that if they're struggling to sleep at night.
Speaker 1:That's true. That's true. I guess it's not the end of the world if he's got to take it off Now, before we wrap this up, because we're almost out of time, are?
Speaker 2:there any last things that you would like to say about chastity? Well, in preparation for talking to you, I was actually looking on. There's a whole subreddit called Cuckold Psychology You're probably familiar and so I went on there and I did some searching for the keyword of chastity to see what people talked about within the world of cuckold psychology, and I found a quote on there that I thought really captured it, honestly, better and more eloquently than I could. So, if it's okay with you, I thought maybe I would just read it and your audience might like it.
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 2:So this was just. It was from a few weeks ago, from a user on Reddit called Chetum K, and here's what he says. He says people that have never been in chastity have no idea how it feels. You assume it's restrictive and uncomfortable.
Speaker 2:The reality is, as long as it's sized properly, chastity is very comfortable and it will cause you to experience arousal like you have never experienced it before. You will leak pre-cum profusely all day long. It feels so good to experience that much arousal that you don't want to orgasm because the 30 second orgasm and that's all gone, and it's not as pleasurable as not coming and staying on the ride. This is the obvious reason that men, whether cucks or not, want to stay locked rather than have sex or masturbate. Add to that the fact that you're a cuck and your wife or girlfriend is doing the thing that turns you on the most. That's why Cuck's Cage because it's the best sex toy ever invented for men, because it feels better than coming.
Speaker 2:If you haven't tried chastity and denial, you should, especially if you're a cuck or if you're a reluctant cuck that can't get out of his own head long enough to try it. The cage will drown out all the insecurities and will replace them with arousal. I thought that was the most awesome quote that really encapsulated this. And the kicker of this that I thought was really fun was after I found that I was like, oh, who is this person? So I looked at his Reddit profile history, his post history, and I saw that he actually is a customer of ours.
Speaker 2:So he actually posted earlier with some photos of one of our cages, which I had no idea when I originally found the quote, so I hope that that helps to encapsulate it and maybe give some encouragement and some inspiration to some of your audience.
Speaker 1:That is beautiful and I love that that's so inspiring for men, because it talks about this being kind of an evolution of male sexuality to something that maybe a lot of guys don't even know is possible, which is fascinating to me. This is so much more than just like a piece of equipment or a symbolism of something. This is truly about something so much more than that. So this conversation has been absolutely fascinating. Katie, I'm so happy that you have come on the show today to talk about this. I'm so happy to have somebody actually explaining all of this stuff about chastity. So thank you so much. Where can everybody learn more about your products, buy your products and that sort of thing?
Speaker 2:Venus, this has been such a blast, so thank you for having me on. People can find us first at kink3dcom, so just kink, then the number three, then the letter dcom. Make sure you go to the website and don't just Google, because we actually have found there are knockoff companies that try to steal our traffic. So Chassis has become so popular that there's a whole world of knockoff cages out there. So go to the website. You can also find us on social media kink3ddesigns. On Twitter X, we have an entire subreddit that's for our brand. So just our kink3d, the kink3d subreddit. And then we're on Blue Sky now as well. Kink3dcom, yeah, yeah, I think we follow you on there already. Yay, any of those places and you can find us.
Speaker 1:Okay, that is amazing. Okay, thank you so much for all of this today. This has just been mind-blowing. I love learning about this. The more I learn about chastity, the more I learn about cuckolding, the more I learn about all of this. It's just like blows my mind. So I think people are going to get a lot out of this show today. Thank you so much for joining me.
Speaker 2:You're very welcome. Thanks so much for having me on. It's been a real pleasure.
Speaker 1:That's going to be it for today's episode. Thank you so much for joining me. Make sure you go to venuscuckoldresscom. That's where you can book a private chat with me, and you can also join the queen's quarters community and get all the amazing benefits, like the private podcast and the helpful cuck tier, where you can get key holding for the private Snapchat group, monthly private chats with me and weekly live hangouts and invites to special live events. Oh, and you can also submit a question or confession for the show. Just go to venuscuckledresscom and click on the link that says the podcast. Make sure you follow me on blue sky social. Yes, I said blue sky social. Fuck Twitter. My handle there is at CuckoldressV. All right, that's it for today's show, you guys. We'll see you next time. Bye.