When The Wife Decides She Wants To Cuck You!

The wife brings up cuckolding first, and it changes everything. Victoria and Scott walk us through how a decade-long marriage that began “vanilla” turns into a deeply connected kink dynamic built on Femdom, playful power exchange, and a shared appetite for experimentation. What will hook you right away is how clearly they separate fantasy from harm: humiliation is a consensual role, not a belief, and empowerment is the point, not an afterthought.

Links:

Pillow Talk Live Chat with Venus & Sergio June 4th - https://www.venuscuckoldress.com/events

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❤️Venus Connections❤️ - Matchmaking for loving cuckolding relationships and female-led relationships. Learn more at https://www.venusconnections.com/

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Transcript

Welcome And What Makes This Rare

SPEAKER_03 0:00

This is the Venus Cuckolders Podcast, a place to learn all things cuckolding for the curious, for the passionate, and for the sexually empowered woman who wants it all.

SPEAKER_02 0:26

Let's go.

SPEAKER_03 0:28

Welcome to the show. I'm your host, Venus. Thanks for joining me today. This episode is so cool because I basically rarely ever hear about this happening. This couple, Victoria and Scott, started out vanilla in their marriage. They went down a kinky rabbit hole together, and she was the one who said, Hey, I want to try cuckolding. I sawten porn and I want to give it a try. And he was like, Whoa. This never happens. It's almost always the husband, the guy, the boyfriend, the partner who decides, you know, oh, I really want this. I gotta ask her if she's gonna be into it. And that's the storyline. That's just how it goes in this in this cuckolding lifestyle. 99% of the time. So it is great to bring you this story today, where she shares why she liked it, why she wanted it, and we hear from him as well about what this was all like for them and how it's been. So I think you'll really like it. If you are interested, curious to learn about cuck holding, this is a great episode for you. If you are, you know, in the lifestyle and wanting to learn about other experiences, this is a great episode for you. If you're a bull and you're interested in learning about couples, this is a great episode for you. So I think you're gonna like it. First, though, for announcements, I just have a couple of them. I'm doing a pillow talk live chat event in the Queen's Quarters online community with Sergio, who was recently on the show. And we're gonna talk about his episode where he shared his story of the experiences he's been able to have within a cuckolding lifestyle or to experience some cuckolding-related desires, role-play experiences as a solo guy, which let's face it, there's lots of solo guys out there who are interested in uh cuckolding, have these desires. So he's gonna talk about what that's been like for him. And it's pretty cool because he's had a lot of really interesting experiences, in-person

Announcements And Ways To Join

SPEAKER_03 2:38

experiences. So that's gonna be June 4th at 1 p.m. Pacific. That's 4 p.m. Eastern time, live in the Queen's Quarters community. It's free to join live. Um, and all you have to do is click the link in the show notes for today or go to VenusCuckled just.com and click on the events page. And last but not least, if you love this show and you want to support it, thank you. You helped me be able to do this as my full-time job. Um, but if you would like to support the show, you can join one of the supporter tiers. There's two of them, a friends with benefits or a helpful cuck tier. And both of them give you access to the library of over 80 bonus episodes. So there's a lot more going on there. And then the Helpful Cuck Tier has a monthly private chat that you can have with me and weekly live hangouts and access to the private Snapchat group. So it's a lot of fun. You get to meet some cool people and have some fun chats. So if you want to support the podcast, you can go to VenusCuckledjust.com and click on the supporter section or just have a little look in the show notes for today. There'll be a link there for you to sign up. So thank you to everybody who allows me to do this as my full-time job. I would not be able to do it without you. All right, that's it for announcements. Let's jump into the show with Victoria and Scott. Here we go. Joining me on the show, I have Victoria and Scott here to share their story about their relationship. Welcome to the show, you guys. Say hello to all of the listeners. Thank you, and hello.

SPEAKER_00 4:32

Hello, everyone.

SPEAKER_03 4:34

So I'm dying to hear this story. Uh, you guys reached out to me. Um, it was earlier, a little while ago, anyway. It was after an episode that really kind of resonated with you. And I'm so happy, happy, happy to have both of you on, but especially to have you, Victoria, because I love having the female uh story, the female perspective shared on this on the show. So thank you for that. Uh so you guys are a married couple, I believe, and um you've been married for quite a while and you've kind of gone this

How Victoria And Scott Started

SPEAKER_03 5:06

down this road of cuckolding. Where did it all start?

SPEAKER_01 5:11

Um, yeah, we've been together for 10 years. And um it started when we first met, we were just kind of hooking up. It was really casual, and we started to realize, um, I kind of started to realize that I was into some kinks and um started exploring that together. And um then what happened was I was listening to a podcast one day. I'd kind of fallen a little bit out of the interest, and he was really diving into kind of the a sub-frenzy, is that the word I'm looking for?

SPEAKER_00 5:43

Yeah, like really into kink at the time. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 5:45

Yeah, he was going real deep, and it kind of made me a little nervous. Wow, he's going really deep into this. And then I listened to a podcast with Aidan Starr. I don't know if you know Michael's, she's the porn star, and she was talking about how Femdom is so empowering for women and um fun and exciting and engaging and for strong women. And I listened to that and I said, you know what? I think she's onto something that really resonated with me when I heard that. And I joined him down that path of getting really excited about kink again. And after we dove in pretty deep, I said, What do you think about cuck building? I think I'm really into this. I'd like to have some new experiences. This is turned to interest me. And then he had to give it some thought. Um, and I'll let you speak for yourself on that.

SPEAKER_00 6:37

Yeah, I was actually super hesitant at first because that wasn't something I had ever really thought about. And when she

The Podcast That Sparked Femdom

SPEAKER_00 6:45

brought it up, I thought about just like you know, what you see in media and everything. And then for me, with the side of Kink that I'm really into, I really like the like being submissive and under power of someone else. And I kind of like put those paths together as I was thinking about it. Over time, this is like months that this was happening, and it finally like linked for me, and then I was full in with it too.

SPEAKER_03 7:13

Yeah, this never happens this way. Like over the last gazillion years I've been learning about cuckolding, like it is really basically never the wife that brings it up and says, Hey, I want to try this. Like it's rare. I can count on one hand the number of times I've heard about that in the last decade plus. So this is super different. I think it kind of like I it's not that far outside of the realm of possibility because you're going down the kink rabbit hole together and you're, you know, talking about power dynamics and stuff like that. But to bring another guy into the equation, that seems like a lot. I Victoria, I want to ask you, like, how did you even, how did you even think about that? And and how were you how why were you so like, yeah, that's what I want to do?

SPEAKER_01 8:08

Um, porn. I was just watching porn and I thought it was really interesting. And um I thought it was really exciting how strong and powerful the women were in those scenes, and um really interested me. You know, after the combination of hearing that podcast with Aiden and um and then exploring, I think porn is empowering and interesting when it's ethical. And um I just got excited about it and I said I really want to try that. And we've been so open with each other about what we like, and um, and so I felt comfortable bringing it to him. Um and he's been excited about it.

SPEAKER_03 8:49

That's amazing. And that's another thing I never come across is women who like get introduced to cuckolding from porn and they're like, Yeah, that looks great. Usually it's the opposite. I'm I'm so surprised right now.

SPEAKER_01 9:02

Well, that's kind of one reason I wanted to reach out to you because when I heard that episode, you're looking for women's stories. We've listened to your podcast, but also a ton of other podcasts. Whenever we road trip, we like to kind of dive down that hole. It keeps us interested, it gives us something to talk about it, we stay awake, all those good things. And um, I had never really heard many women say the same thing. Um, but they have to be out there. There's gotta be people. But we always heard the stories of you know, the man kind of sheepishly bringing this proposal to his wife, and um I just I don't know, I just felt like my story was different and I wanted to share it.

SPEAKER_03 9:45

So yes, this is amazing. I yeah, never hear about this. This is so amazing. Cause I will say that, like for a lot of women when they look at, you know, the common scripts in cuckled porn, which is the, you know, they really lay on the degradation and the humiliation and the um, you know, the the really heavy on the femme dom scripts and stuff like that. For a lot of women, that seems that's like a huge step that they don't know that they could ever get to. They're just like, I don't know, that seems really mean, that seems kind of cruel. But for you, it sounds like you saw that, you looked at it, you thought, that seems very empowering. Like I could totally see myself in that position, which is amazing because like I just never really like it's so uncommon to have women kind of make that connection.

SPEAKER_01 10:40

So wow, that's I think maybe that's one thing with us that's kind of different, um, maybe about our dynamic, is that we really view kink and play as like fun. It's it should be fun, it should be enjoyable. And so even when we're doing things that

Porn Influence And Ethical Empowerment

SPEAKER_01 10:55

are like feminine-based and humiliation is involved, we know we have trust in each other that we don't actually feel that way. You know, it's not something like a reflection of who I think he actually is as a person. It's fun, it's playful, it's enjoyable. Um, it's you know, it should be something empowering for women and also empowering. I think I don't want to speak on your behalf, but for you as well to be able to explore your fantasies and yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 11:23

Having that like um vulnerability put out there and actually received is very powerful and it's fun. And the other part, too, that I think getting back to all this is Victoria was already at a point where she was that very dominant woman in the FemDom videos when we were doing stuff. So it wasn't a big step, I think, for her to actually go from that idea to the cuckolding, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 11:51

Okay, Scott, you guys started out your relationship vanilla. I mean, and then you went down the kinky rabbit hole. And and I know you talked about like it's it's it actually feels good to be so vulnerable with my partner with your partner, right? But like how has it been for you to really explore that kind of submission, the humiliation part of going from vanilla land to the kink land? I mean, has it was it difficult? Is it difficult? Do you did you have to reconcile some things emotionally to be able to get there? Is it work that you have to do?

SPEAKER_00 12:32

Yeah, I'd say there's some of that involved, but I think ultimately, like up until the time we started really getting into any of the kink stuff, I had never even thought of it. I was very vanilla. Um but once we kind of dabbled into it, Victoria was already slightly into kink a little bit, but not into the same kind of stuff. So we started playing around, and then when we found what we liked was my submission, her dominance. Um, that's where it was like a switch flipped, and it was like it was more like the floodgates were open. I was like, I want to try this, I want to do this, I want to go with all these things, and that's where Victoria was like, this is getting to be a bit too much, and that's where she kind of stepped back a little bit. Um, and when that happened too, it was one of those things where I had to I started like looking at myself and being like, is this normal? Well, probably not, but is this fine and healthy and everything? And you know, what I found is with all that, if it's between consenting adults, it doesn't matter what you're into into, like enjoy it. Like life's you get this one life. Why would you try to push back things you really want to enjoy and things you find great?

SPEAKER_03 13:56

Right. I know so many people get hung up,

Scott’s Hesitation Then The Switch

SPEAKER_03 14:00

really hung up on why like am I normal? Why am I into this? What does this mean about me if I want if I'm into this? It's like who who cares? Like who gives a fuck? You enjoy it, like it's consensual, like safe, like just fucking do it.

SPEAKER_02 14:18

100%.

SPEAKER_03 14:18

But I get I get why people are constantly trying to like psychologically evaluate themselves because of their desires, and it's like it's just a losing game, don't do that.

SPEAKER_01 14:28

But well, and that's one thing too. Like I said, we've indulged in so much media, and um, we really noticed one thing we like is listening to other women, I think, especially like dominant women talk about what they enjoy about it. I think the people that kind of turn us off that we don't enjoy are people that are like degrad uh what's the word I'm looking for? Degrading, degrading other people, but they're but not in like a fun and playful way, not in a consenting way, like other dominant women who are making fun of like the people who come to them for their services. Um, we like the people who take pleasure and joy and um in in the play. Um and so that's something that we find really empowering is like, hey, you know, we like to listen to other stories about people who are having fun. They're consenting, they're communicating with each other, they're they're playful, they're fun, they're insightful, they're they're not making fun of people genuinely for who they are, but in the play setting. That's what we like.

SPEAKER_03 15:30

I love that. Oh my god, I love that so much. I think I'm probably similar in that like I really love the on authenticity of it just being really who they are and not just performative, as in like, I want to just tell you you're a piece of shit, like all of you. Like, you know, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 15:48

Yeah, yeah. It's kind of interesting, like they're just doing it for money and not for any enjoyment. And I I that's that huge turn off for me when I hear that. So yeah, yeah, I get that.

SPEAKER_03 16:00

So there's one thing I've definitely learned over the last decade plus is that there's a gazillion ways to have fun with cuckolding desires and fantasies in a relationship, and or even without a relationship. There's a ton of different ways to have fun with this kind of lifestyle. Um, and they're all valid, they're all fun, they're all great. Um, but what has it been like for you guys? Like in the beginning, when Victoria, when you brought this up and you were like, like, what do you think? You want to do this? Was it, did you have something specific in mind? And has is has it turned out that way, or um yes and no to all of those questions.

SPEAKER_01 16:44

I kind of because I started seeing it in porn, obviously that's a very theatrical version of it. Um, and pretty quickly realized that that's not actually what I want it to look like in practice. Sometimes we like fantasize about that when we're playing, you know, we like to take it more on stream than we would actually do, like in person, maybe. Um, but I started to realize I liked the idea of casual play with other people. I don't um want to have relationships with other men. I'm not I want to have friendships, but I don't want to be polyamorous, maybe is the way to say it.

SPEAKER_03 17:23

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 17:23

Um, and um because we live in a very rural area, it's been hard to dip our toes all the way in. And so we've been playing around with flirting with other guys and like going out when we're out of town and getting to know people. Um, and then we fantasize about it a lot. Um, we make plans, we plan dream about the future and what that could look like. Um, we've tried the apps, um, which we've already talked about before, but really tough out

Consent Over Shame And Performance

SPEAKER_01 17:55

there. Um, and like had a little bit of fun talking to other men doing that, but really people were kind of creepy. Um so it's really bad. Um, and so we've done other experiences with other women, um, but we haven't yet had an experience like having sex with another man. Um, we're still trying to find that right person. I really care about it being safe, sane, consensual, um, and especially opening up our marriage. So um we're excited to dive deeper in as we go, but really enjoying taking it step by step um and just flirting with other men and trying to talk to people, and we're looking for events to go to and um really excited about what's coming for us with it, and um I don't know, a lot of like fantasizing and planning about the future and doing it in a safe way in our community when we can.

SPEAKER_03 18:57

So these experiences that you had with another woman, was that like a cuckolding kind of experience or just like a threesome thing?

SPEAKER_01 19:05

Well, I've hooked up with other women um before we were together and then while we were together, but he wasn't involved, okay. Um, which is something we kind of realized was maybe early on should have been a hint that we kind of like that. Um, and then we went and saw we've seen pro Doms, um, where me and the Dom dominate him together. Ooh, spicy. Um, yeah, it's so fun. It's really fun and just kind of like that tease and play about like, hey, you know, you don't always get to be included in everything. And you know, this is something that you're here to serve us, and really the like mental stimulation as well as like the physical enjoyment between the two of us with that is was really exciting. Um, and I just find it so empowering to play with other women. Um, and so there was like kind of some cucking involved with the women, and then like some femdom involved. It was a little bit of everything.

SPEAKER_03 20:08

So that's so awesome. I love that. But okay, yeah, for sure. I can absolutely see how beneficial that would be to hire a pro dom to do those kind of sessions because not only are you like enjoying it, but I'm sure learning all this stuff from like this professional.

SPEAKER_01 20:25

Like there, I this is where I kind of nerd out on this, is like they're so cool. They're so fun. And that was something I found I was so nervous to go do that. And they were like, hey, this is really cool. This I'd never get to dominate a man with another woman that's not like a pro. And they taught me so much about like how to how to dom and what that looks like, and like how to play with his mind. And um it was really exciting, and they're so inclusive. That's something I that made me feel comfortable to reach out to you, is I found that other women um who genuinely enjoy this are really excited to share that experience with other women.

unknown 21:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 21:09

So

Building A Real Script Beyond Porn

SPEAKER_01 21:10

um they were excited, and um, yeah, like of course you're paying them, so that's part of it, but they I think you get a feeling from people like if they actually care or if they're having maybe if they're having fun, maybe is a better way to say it, but like um or not. And it was really engaging and really great and so connecting for the two of us, um, which is another reason I was like, hey, I think it'd be really exciting to bring another man into the mix because that's something we even though there's a third person involved, we feel much closer by having new experiences together. Um it improves our communication, it's something fun to do together, it gives us something to reminisce and talk about, it opens up new ideas. Um and so that was a really awesome experience both times. Well, for me.

SPEAKER_03 22:02

Me too. Yes. I was gonna say, I was gonna say, Scott, what was that like for you? You like the like I can only imagine it's not just your wife out of Pro Dom, too. Like you are outnumbered.

SPEAKER_00 22:14

100%. Like it was one of the the first time we went, it was just so overwhelming with like as an experience. Um not only just like with two dominant women taking control, but also just like being in a dungeon and all the different things. It was it was one of those things, even looking back at it now, I can't really put it into words because it was just such a great experience. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 22:47

I can imagine. That was so great. So, how how have you been, Scott, with the or how do you feel about the the label cuckold? Is it something that you feel like, yeah, I could totally get into that? I feel like that's that could be me, or you are like how what is there any stigma around that word or word that you're not comfortable with?

SPEAKER_00 23:10

Um yeah, I think a little bit in the way that like I'm not gonna just go run up the street and be like, hey everyone, I'm a cuckold, check me out. Um but like personally, I don't think there's anything wrong with it. Like, it's not something like I'm not worried that Victoria's gonna see me as a cuckhold and be like, our relationship's completely different now. Like, nothing's changing from that. I don't have any like personal issues with it. I think you know it's just a word. We put whatever connotations and meanings to words that we choose ourselves. And if you say, hey, this is something, but it can be empowering because not only am I finding something that I like, I'm fine, I'm finding enough to identify with it. And then I can go down and search that and really explore and live that lifestyle.

SPEAKER_03 24:10

That's amazing. Yeah, so I get I've over the years had a lot of guys say like they're afraid to really embrace that term. They're afraid to really embrace this kind of relationship because their fear is that their wife or partner will has to, in their mind, they don't understand how they could not lose respect for them. That this there's no way that you could be a cuckold and treated like a cuckold in your sexual desires

Pro Domme Sessions And What They Taught

SPEAKER_03 24:40

without her somehow like thinking all of a sudden that you're some loser or something like that. What do you say to that?

SPEAKER_00 24:47

So, what I'd say is we've been married for a long time now. And while we were figuring out what we liked and didn't like about BDSM and that set of things, we have done a lot of things that personally I would say are more humiliating than what people envision cuck holding as. And we've done a lot of it and a lot of different things, and she's never changed how she looks at me. We've never had any change in our relationship because of it. And I think if you find the right person that you can open up to on different things, and when when that clicks and that links together, any kind of like little kinks, if they one, if they do change it, it probably isn't a true relationship that matters and works for you. But if it is a good relationship, it's not gonna change how they see you.

SPEAKER_01 25:44

I think it's sexy. I think it's really sexy to be open and excited to try new things. Um, I love that about him. I think like we've both done things where we said maybe we don't want to do that again, but it's you know, I don't know, it's fun, it's playful, it's like we're gonna try it. If we like it, we like it. If we don't, we don't, we can move on and try something else.

SPEAKER_03 26:06

So see, this is what I tell these guys. I'm like, you don't understand. If you are really open and vulnerable and willing to try and willing to expose your insecurities and all the things, like with your partner, she's gonna think that feel that that's like admirable, that that's something that's like amazing about you. And they're like, no, she's not. She's gonna think I'm a loser. Like, ah, driving me nuts.

SPEAKER_01 26:31

Well, and I think like I find him to be very masculine. Um, and I I've always said this that I personally wouldn't really want to dominate a man who was like, poor me, like you know, I'm so weak, and that's not my thing. So um, I really like that he's confident. That's like what makes it fun for me is that he is big and strong and confident and um exciting. You know, that's that's what's engaging about the domination for me because he has she wants to overcome something else. Like he's masculine and he's not afraid of his masculinity, and um, and that's what makes it fun to like you know be powerful with him.

SPEAKER_03 27:17

Yeah. That's so awesome. Oh my god, I love that. So earlier you talked about how you know you you haven't had this experience with another guy yet, but you would like to at some point and thinking about what that might look like. And you said you you originally kind of gravitated towards the porn script cuck holding session in your mind, but that now that you've kind of evolved past that and you kind of want something a little bit different. Can you kind of give me an idea of what that might look like your very first time with another guy?

SPEAKER_01 27:45

I mean, I would pay for it, honestly. I think like we've had such a good experience with the women that we've paid for our sexual experiences with. So, like, why not do with a man who's like safe and maybe affiliated with an organization like a dungeon or something? I would a hundred percent do that because for me that would make it safe and fun. Um, and you can also kind of feel a little more confident that you're gonna have a good experience. And then I also envision us when we're in areas where we can, you know, like going to the bar and meeting other men. And if something goes somewhere like that, I would be really excited for it. Um, but I don't want to force a relationship that doesn't feel good for me just to have the experience. Like I care more about like investing time and money into having an experience that is exciting and pleasurable than just to like go meet a guy to do like the fulfill fantasy that's maybe not what I like or not who I'm interested in. I think maybe I'm a little picky.

SPEAKER_03 28:52

So um yeah, well, just meeting some random dude or on the internet or at a bar or something like that. There's so many unknowns that could happen and there's so much at risk there. It seems like it seems like a lot to risk for for a fantasy that seemed that

The Cuckold Label And Respect Fears

SPEAKER_03 29:10

should be important to make it right, you know.

SPEAKER_01 29:12

Well, and maybe we're maybe a little bit on the freaky side with like what we like. So um, so like I think with somebody that you would pay for an experience like that, you could you can live out like the porn like fantasy of it. Whereas like somebody at the bar is probably more likely that he would just like maybe not be present and it would be like yeah, a more diluted version of it, um, where like we would like him to be there and to be involved and yeah, um, you know, curate the fantasy that you want. Yeah, and I think I never would have been open to that. If you had asked me like three years ago, I would have been, I would have said that's insane. I would never pay for that. Um, but I I absolutely would. And we've talked about it, I know you're too. So yeah.

SPEAKER_03 29:56

Yeah, I wish that was more of a thing because like it just seems like a positive thing all around. Um, in my mind, anyway. I'm like, yeah, if you want this to be exactly what you want it to be, and with somebody who is invested in making sure that that happens the way you want it to happen, then that's the way you do it. So yeah, I wish that that was more of a thing. Yeah. I we 100% do that. And I wanted to ask you, I know you mentioned something earlier about living in like a rural area. Um, I know a lot of couples understandably are worried about discretion. And you mentioned something about, you know, um, trips away and stuff like that. But what are some of the precautions that uh and rules that you've set in place in your relationship to make sure that you are stay discreet as possible so that people don't find out that this is what you're into?

SPEAKER_01 30:51

Well, we really believe in not involving people who don't want to be involved in uh what's the word I'm looking for? The um like we don't want to expose like our family members or people like that to what we're into. So we just don't talk about it in front of people who we aren't sure are welcoming and accepting of that. Um, we also don't engage like with flirting at the bar. We're also both professionals in our community. Um, and so it it could potentially impact our work. And so um we just have communication boundaries about like when we talk about things, what we talk about, um, the extent of that. My work is a little bit more forgiving, perhaps. Um, but it's maybe not now. So I don't know what you're gonna say.

SPEAKER_00 31:42

I'd go on a little farther too with that, is like we make it a point when we go out where she's gonna flirt, we get out of the area for that. So we set some times a few times a year where we're gonna where we go um to neighboring cities. And that's where she can go to the bar, flirt around, see if anything works. Um, and knowing that we are gonna continue doing that, you know, every month or every few months makes it so she doesn't have to go and the very first person that flirts back with her, she would have been like, all right, we're doing this and it doesn't work. So we're we're trying to be smart with it. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 32:25

The whole flirting with other people is such a fun way to like play around with this fantasy that's not super high risk, but like is easy and fun.

SPEAKER_00 32:36

Like, and it's given us plenty to talk about and fantasize about after every time. So yeah.

SPEAKER_01 32:42

I bet. Well, and the same thing like with the apps. I always set my settings not in our community

Paying For Safety And A First Bull

SPEAKER_01 32:50

and um like just had it in neighboring areas, so it was a lot more discreet as well. That's kind of another way we acted on that, but there's lots of things I think we've learned too that it doesn't have to be some not every experience is like going to the dungeon, having this really intense experience. Sometimes it's little things as well that are really exciting and like, oh, that was kind of hot. Like, I like that. You know, did you see that that guy was like flirting with you? And that was really interesting, and stuff like that, you know, fuels exciting things for us to talk about at home, too.

SPEAKER_03 33:26

So I love that. That is so great because like I would say, like, there's maybe a lot of couples who especially kind of just trying to dip their toes in this and stuff like that, really focused on that one her having sex with another guy. Like, they're just it's like tunnel vision, especially the husband, like tunnel vision, like I that's the goal. Like we are working towards that, and like everything we do is that's exactly like all it's all for that. But it sounds like you guys are kind of like open to all these little tiny little experiences along the way and and enjoying those for what they are too, and that those are valuable parts of exploring this kind of relationship.

SPEAKER_00 34:06

Yeah, I'd say like if it's all or nothing, it's gonna be more nothing all the time. So mine as well be like, okay, what are points along the way that we can get that add up?

unknown 34:18

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 34:19

Yeah, because this struggle is real to find people in rural areas, like smaller, anything anything outside of like big cities, man, fuck, it's hard. Like it's it's really hard. You've got the discretion aspect where everybody fucking knows everybody in your little town or whatever, right? And then you just got the fact that it's just so hard to find somebody who would be into this in the way that you are and all the things the stars align. It's a small pool just for dating, like regular dating. Do you ever get frustrated? Like because like a lot of couples, they're just like, ah, fuck this. Like this is way too hard. I'm not gonna do this.

SPEAKER_01 35:02

I don't get frustrated. I think it's you and you don't have to. You get frustrated. Okay, I don't know. I think well, yeah, maybe a little bit. I think it's like when I put my mind to something, I get excited about it. And I'm like, I want to do this now, which I think again is different for us and a lot of the people we've heard you talk to because he's he's kind of like, well, when it happens, it happens. And I'm more interested in actively making it happen. But um, I try to be patient though, and just be inviting. And I think when the right time comes, I'll be ready for it. And we'll be ready for it as a couple. So yeah. But I don't know, maybe I talk about it more than you do.

SPEAKER_00 35:42

You definitely talk about it more than me. And I think there there get to be times where she's like, all right, we got the weekend off. We are going out of town right now, and um that just pop up out

Discretion Rules In A Small Town

SPEAKER_00 35:55

of nowhere because she's like just itching to go.

SPEAKER_03 35:58

Love it. Love that. Um, this next question is for both of you, but Victoria, I'll start with you first. Um, how has adding kink and cuckolding to your relationship, to your marriage that started out vanilla, um, how has it affected your relationship with your husband, Scott?

SPEAKER_01 36:20

Um, there was definitely times, like you said, where he was really diving in deep where it was a little maybe more distant sexually. Um, but then as we both started to realize there's things we're excited about, there's things you're excited about, and I'm excited about, and we're both willing to try what the other person is interested in, then we started to get really close and um closer emotionally, closer physically. Um, we started to have better sex, um, more frequent sex. And it's something that's really important to us, and I think very important to all relationships to have really fun, enjoyable sex. It brings people closer together. And so I think overall it's been a really great thing for our relationship. I felt closer to you, um, and it's brought a lot of excitement and energy into our dynamics. So that's it started off like a little bumpy getting into it, and then as we got further in, it became something that really brought us closer together.

SPEAKER_03 37:26

And what about you, Scott?

SPEAKER_00 37:28

So I'd actually say too that before we were together, I was a little bit of a man whore. Um and with that, I was like just chasing the next conquest all the time for a long time. And once we finally started having kinky sex, what got made me go down that path of like getting really deep into it is because I realized that was what I was always actually trying to search for was that kind of connection that I wasn't having through sex alone. Um so it was a little bumpy for a second because I was like, oh, this is everything I want all the time. And then once we did level out, I feel like it's really changed our relationship a lot because we've gotten much closer than we already were when we got married. Um, and it's just continued to grow our relationship together, not just in the bedroom, but in our day-to-day life as well.

SPEAKER_03 38:32

That's amazing. Yeah, I hear this a lot from women who have tried cuckolding with a partner, and they're just like they were not really expecting that kind of next level connection that you get together.

Flirting As Low Risk Foreplay

SPEAKER_03 38:45

And I'm assuming it's not um distinct to to cuckolding that this is what kink um does for couples as well. Um, and I just think it's like it's amazing. I wish more women knew about that aspect of it. Um, Victoria, I wanted to ask you, and this is so gonna be so interesting, your perspective on this, because like like I mentioned before, so many women get weird about the cuckolding thing, but you didn't. You were just like, nah, that looks that like that look that looks fun. That sounds like a fun time. Why do you think that there are so many women out there who uh are not interested in in cuckolding? Um, because it is, it absolutely is something that's heavily driven by men. Um, it's it's the male gays, a lot of it, it's men who are buying the content online who are listening to the shows. 87% men listening to the show right now. Why do you think that there's so very little, seems like so very little interest from women out there? I think that's a great question.

SPEAKER_01 39:47

I think I don't know. I think for me it comes down to like the the masculinity and that and the domination, where I think if women could see it and what came at it from the perspective of like, this is me taking ownership of my sexuality, and I have the freedom to make decisions that I want to make and also have a meaningful relationship with somebody that I feel very close, or my relationship is very secure, I feel very safe and secure, and I can have fun with other people. Um, I think they would enjoy it more. But I think to me, just from listening to so many men talk about their experience, it's like they come to their wife in this like very meek way and they're like, baby, please. And then the woman feels like they're kind of they don't they don't come to it from this empowered perspective. And I think if more women could see that like this is really fucking empowering, you know, to have the ability to choose what I want to do and also, you know, do something that connects me with my partner, like I think they would enjoy it more. Um, I think we get boxed in too with the idea of like polyamory, where you have to have a relationship with somebody else. And I think the idea that you can just have fun and it doesn't always have to be like super freaky, or sometimes it can, no, but you can write your script yourself. Um, I think more women would be excited about that too. But I think if men were like coming into it in this less kind of meager way, women would be excited about it if they could see it from a different perspective and men propose it in a different way too. I think that would it would change my perspective. I just could see if he was like, Oh, you know, I just want you to tell me how weak and a loser I am like that wouldn't be exciting to me. Like what's exciting to me is being like, hey, I'm gonna do this and you're gonna be okay with it. And if you're not, I'm gonna make you be okay with it. And you know, it's all consensual. Like, that's exciting to me.

SPEAKER_03 41:54

So

How Kink Strengthens Their Marriage

SPEAKER_03 41:55

oh my god, I love that so much. Yeah, the way the guys pitch this to their wife, oh, they fail miserably so much of the time, they rarely get it right. And then, you know, I get it, like it's this is an awkward conversation, but to have, but it's very, very important how you phrase this, how you get buy-in from women to want to do this kind of thing. I mean, it's very important, but the empowerment aspect is key.

SPEAKER_01 42:23

I think that's maybe AI is like listening to me or something. I don't know, when it shows me porn, because the the porn that I usually see about it is not like the woman being passed around between the guys, it's like the woman dominating and like almost dominating like both men. And that is really exciting to me too. Like, I definitely do not want to be dominated by anyone.

unknown 42:46

Right.

SPEAKER_01 42:46

And so that's not part of my fantasy about it. And so I think that's a difference too. Like, it doesn't have to be you submitting to another man, like you dominating and then submitting. I think that gets confusing sometimes. Like you can have whatever you want. I think people really box themselves into the idea of what a fantasy has to be. And that's the great thing is you get to craft it. You get to you get to decide whatever it is. It doesn't have to be your husband saying, This is what you're gonna do. You get to be the decision maker and the you know authoritative. And we don't have like a 24-7 dynamic or something like that, but I definitely take the lead, I would say, in a lot of things, including this. So I love that.

SPEAKER_03 43:33

Uh Scott, well, I want to ask you, what's this been like for you to witness this kind of growth and sexual empowerment with your wife? I mean, you guys have been married for 10 years and you started out vanilla and and you both really dove into this kink and and cuckolding uh kind of world. But what's it been like for you to witness her kind of transform in this way?

SPEAKER_00 43:57

Well, I would say I've always been. Drawn towards powerful and dominant women, not like dominant in the bedroom, just powerful women. And this is the biggest turn on seeing my wife be this person that's just fully embracing what she's liking and what we're liking together.

SPEAKER_03 44:17

You guys really hit the jackpot with each other, like 100%. For a vanilla couple, you guys started out that way, but like, damn, you guys ever align with your kinks.

SPEAKER_01 44:28

I think it's worth saying too that the first time we ever hooked up, I came to his door and I was like, listen, we're gonna have sex right now. And he was like, okay. So it was vanilla-ish.

Why More Women Don’t Want It

SPEAKER_03 44:45

There were signs. Yes. And he liked it. I love it. This is so awesome. Um, oh my god, I love you guys' story so much. Before we wrap this up, I just have one last question. And I know there's gonna be a lot of people listening to this episode who are gonna be inspired by this story and just learning so much because your your your relationship is so unique. I love it. But um, for the people who are listening who would maybe like to go down this road with their spouse or their future spouse or whatever, are they but they're kind of nervous about about it. Do you have any advice of things for these people that things that worked for you guys that you might want to share with them?

SPEAKER_01 45:33

I would just say, you know, if your relationship assuming your relationship is safe, um, you know, I'm I'm working on that assumption that the relationship is safe. That if you come to your partner and you share that, like, I'm really excited about this. I understand this might be something really different, but I would just like to talk about it. Can I tell you why it excites me and how I envisioned this looking? And then we could brainstorm together and just explore. I think that that's a great place to start. But I think coming to it with a the air of excitement, people genuinely feel more engaged when you are excited about something. I think that's a big deterrent for people is when they're like, Oh, I don't know. And I think saying, I'm really engaged by this. This seems like it would be really fun. Would you be willing to try this with me or like dip your toe in? We could start in this really small way. I think it also gets overwhelming for people when they say, How do I need to go out and meet a guy right now and have sex with him?

SPEAKER_03 46:28

Like, oh yeah.

SPEAKER_01 46:30

You know, you can start in these little ways and just exploring things together and you know, taking it slow, expressing excitement, that's just what works for us.

SPEAKER_00 46:40

But yeah. And I would say you don't have to like plan out the conversation with someone perfectly of like, hey, this is what I'm looking for. You don't have to like obsess over that and push it off until it's the exact right moment. Like, the sooner you start talking about it when the time is relatively right, the sooner you can work towards something together. If you just always hold off and you're like, oh, they weren't in the best of mood tonight. Maybe we'll I'll bring it up tomorrow. You're just gonna push it off forever. And then next thing you know, five years are gonna go past, and you'll be like, I didn't say anything. Now I'm still doing the exact same stuff.

SPEAKER_03 47:20

Yeah, and how often do we hear about that happening? That happens a lot with couples, like just the fear is real, though. The fear of bringing this up and being vulnerable. And I get it, I get it. And that's like the more you fear it, the harder it becomes, the less likely you are to bring it up. And it's just this vicious cycle. But I mean, for everybody listening, fucking do it. Just talk to your partner about it in the right way, talk in the right way about it. And you never know, like you might be evolving into a relationship that is like I have a very good friend who is, you know, started out in this, I mean, super vanilla, super vanilla marriage. And it's been years now, and they've just slowly, slowly talked about it over the years. Like, I mean painfully slow, but now they're kinky as fuck. I mean, you're together.

SPEAKER_01 48:11

I would say too, like, I guess sorry to interrupt you, but the other thing I would say is like if you feel excited about something, like find a resource about it and share that. Like, send your wife or your husband a podcast that you really liked, or like

How To Bring It Up With Confidence

SPEAKER_01 48:25

a clip that you really enjoyed, and be like, maybe this is a perspective that you might enjoy and this might resonate with you because that's something that has really worked for us. Like, hey, I saw this. What do you think of this? You know, we've been like a little nervous to share things with each other. Like, do you think you'd be into this? You know, it is a little nerve-wracking, but you never know unless you try. And yeah, um, so like use resources, use curiosity. Um, and that helps too. You know, sometimes it's hard to articulate why you like something, but if you can show somebody, um that can help too.

SPEAKER_03 49:00

Yes, I would definitely say be careful which resources, like don't be maybe maybe not share like this like really explicit porn. Um but I know.

SPEAKER_00 49:10

Well, Victoria means what what Victoria means is like podcasts, and she has a library of books and a lot of stuff, a lot of resources. And if she's into something, or if I'm into something, we'll both search it on like Amazon, an actual book of it, and order it, and then we read through it and we're like, what do we like about it? What did we not like about the book itself? And then we're like, all right, should we proceed with something with regards to this?

SPEAKER_03 49:38

Yeah, yeah. I love that. Yes, and you can listen to audiobooks together on a road trip or a podcast together on a road trip.

SPEAKER_02 49:45

Yep.

SPEAKER_01 49:45

Or sometimes I'll listen to one and then I'll be like, You listen to this now. What do you think? Um, and then he'll send me some, and just it's a way to kind of share ideas without having to clearly articulate exactly what it is that excites you about it.

SPEAKER_03 50:00

And yeah, you know, that's sometimes you don't even know. I mean, it's hard to articulate, but so for a lot for some uh definitely for some guys, they don't know why this turns them on, like they just can't explain it themselves. But they can share that hey, this is exciting to me.

SPEAKER_01 50:17

It's you know, don't know why, but it is well, and I think that comes with a lot of like shame around kink and exploration too, right? Where people think, is this I think you said it maybe early on, is this making me super weird that I like this? And like maybe, but that's okay.

SPEAKER_03 50:34

So yeah, who cares? Well, those are fantastic um suggestions. I love the part about you know, listening to podcasts and reading books and sharing all of that together is fantastic. So um, thank you both so much for coming on the show today and sharing your story. This has been one of my favorite in a long time because, like, I love listening to your story is so different from what I actually usually come across. So thank you for uh reaching out and be willing to share your story on the show. Both Victoria and Scott really appreciate it.

SPEAKER_00 51:09

But we're happy to add some variety for you, Venus.

SPEAKER_03 51:12

Yeah, thank you. So nice to meet you. That's gonna be it for today's episode. Thank you so much for joining me. Make sure you go to VenusCuckledris.com. That's where you can book a private chat with me. And you can also join the Queen's Porters community and get all the amazing benefits like the private podcast and the helpful cup tier, where you can get key holding, the private Snapchat group, monthly private chats with me, and weekly live hangouts and invites to special live events. Oh, and you can also submit a question or confession for the show. Just go to VenusCuckledjust.com and click on the link that says the podcast. Make sure you follow me on Blue Sky Social. Yes, I said Blue Sky Social. Fuck Twitter. My handle there is at CuckleJustV. Alright, that's it for today's show. You guys, we'll see you next time.